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Frank Questions
James Wysong · August 8, 2004

I know my columns may bring some readers to a boiling point. Topics like infants in first class, fat flight attendants, or how I nearly lost my manhood in Mexico City, have sparked hundreds of e-mails - positive, negative, but never indifferent.

But enough from me. I'm turning this column over to you in an effort to even things out.

Q: In your last column you talked about "flying with granny." What about grandpa? Don't tell me you are a victim of sexism? You, of all characters, should know better. (Veronica, St Louis)

A: You are 100 percent correct. I just meant that there are a disproportionate amount of older female flight attendants. There are many "grandfather stewards" working out on the line.

I received quite a few responses to that article, both good and bad.

Edith from Minnesota said, "I am one of those flying grannies that you write of in your last article. I want to thank you for making me laugh and poking fun at me at the same time. People may laugh but it is all so true. I am 69 and still flying because I can't afford to retire. The airline industry never expected this job to be a full-time career, so their poor planning and mine has come back to kick both sides in the face. I try very hard not to be as bitter as my coworkers, but if I ever meet my CEO in person, I will give him a good sock in the eye."

Well Edith, if you ever meet up with your CEO, I want to know every detail.

Q: You talk about older flight attendants, but what about the obese crewmembers? Surely, there has to be some kind of weight policy in place. (Dot, White Plains)

A: The weight policy has recently been suspended and it's Frank, not Shirley. This is a very delicate subject and rather than anger a whole new crowd, I will walk lightly (no pun intended). Airlines were getting sued left and right when the weight policy was in place.

Plus, to implement the policy proved to be even more expensive. There were contract clauses like paid leave, fitness programs and rehabilitation for binge eaters. So it was taken away and the subject is avoided even though many crewmembers these days probably couldn't fit through a window exit. If there is a weight/size policy for passengers, shouldn't there be one for crewmembers? In my frank opinion, I would have to respond with a heavy "yes."

Q: In a dispute between a passenger wishing to recline his seat and the passenger behind him who insists that the seat remain fully upright, what does a flight attendant who is asked to intervene say? Does a passenger have either the right to recline or the right to his full amount of leg space? Please don't give the "we try to help people work it out" non-answer. One of the two passengers must be right and the other, wrong. (Anonymous, Las Vegas)

A: Say you're on a flight, the seatbelt sign goes off and the person in front of you reclines his seat into your lap. Or, not wanting any service, you recline your seat in order to sleep and the person behind you starts kicking your seat in rebellion. Did you know 75 percent of all in-flight fights are caused by disputes relating to the seat-reclining issue?

The person in front of you has a right to recline his seat, as undoubtedly the passenger in front of them has done the same. Similarly, the person in the window seat has the right to keep his window shade open during the movie.

Try the nice approach or get a flight attendant to ask them to raise their seat first, as kicking the seat never seems to work very well. When forced to give a direct answer, three different airlines responded with "the passenger does have the right to recline but we have flight attendants onboard who try to help people work it out."

So there is your answer - and your non-answer.

Q: Do the airlines ever wash the blankets onboard? I found a soiled blanket that just about made me sick. (Susan, Pittsburgh)

A: The answer in a nutshell is, yes, but not very often.

There are variations among different airlines, but generally the blankets and pillows are reused for several cycles. Blankets on international flights are cleaned much more often than on domestic flights. Now that the low-cost craze is taking over, pillows and blankets are getting harder and harder to find. As far as cleaning the seat covers onboard, it is similar to the hotel bedspread issue - rarely if ever.

But then again, there is no chance I would ever be caught naked on an airplane seat…well, almost no chance.

Q: What's the deal with charging for every little item onboard? What happened to the days of the playing cards? (Anonymous)

A: Gone are the days of wings, playing cards, and coloring books. The airlines are losing money these days and are busy trying to emulate the low-cost carriers. I have seen the future of air travel and it is not a pretty picture.

While over in Europe, I flew on a Spanish airline that charged for everything, including water and coffee. What's next, coin operated lavatories and overhead bins?

Some airlines don't charge for the movies but either don't wash the headsets or play older reruns; one has a better frequent flier club, and another is known for funny flight attendants. At the end of the day, what is going to get your business is price and frequency of flights. Wouldn't it be nice if an airline could be a low-cost carrier and retain some quality amenities?

Can anyone say JetBlue? (And no, I don't work for them.)

James Wysong has worked as a flight attendant with two major international carriers during the past fifteen years. He is the author of the "The Plane Truth: Shift Happens at 35,000 Feet" and "The Air Traveler's Survival Guide." For more information about Frank or his books, see his Web site or e-mail him.